LET ME BE THE MONSTER.

01.

02.

“ i cannot bear to see you grieving. “ :)

the song of achilles meme // not accepting

LILLY IS SILENT when she walks, more so than any Jedi padawan that Anakin’s come to know. Not that he’s come to know many. The longstanding resentment kindled between he && the other learners during his initial admission to the Order has never been extinguished. Bitter embers burning beneath every strained interaction. Anakin is never what they want. Too mercurial, too hard to pin down to bother with. Even Ferus’s attempts always end in frustration, && leave him feeling more alone as a free man than he ever did as a ~~slave~~.

But Lilly’s not like the others. Not like anyone Anakin’s ever met. He can feel her deeply in the Force— a dense, tumultuous presence that burns blue && hot like star on the edge of supernova. If he focuses directly on it the boy can feel her singe the borders of his awareness, until his thoughts in drift off in a cinder’s flight from fire. The heat of her is familiar, comforting almost. As if they derive from the same spirals of the galaxy.

Unfortunately, the similarities in the extent of their abilities also means that keeping secrets from Lilly is nigh-impossible.

❝ I’m— I’m not grieving… ❞ He trails off, too much pressure to the fore all at once, washing up in a riot of churning sentiments. His mech hand — a change that still manages to throw off Anakin’s balance — curls around his thigh. The sting of its sharp finger pads promise a constellation of broken blood vessels in the morning, but the pain is centering in a way ~~meditation~~ cannot be. ❝ I’m worried— about the war, && what’s going to happen. ❞ Dooku’s teeth flashing as he shears off Anakin’s right arm; his mother’s lifeless body stirring the roiling black fury that lurks ever-present beneath his skin; Padme’s soft lips pressing stars into the backs of his eyelids. He’d accumulated too many secrets too quickly with nowhere to store them. How long before he can’t hold them in anymore?

❝ I’m going to fight. As soon as they make me a knight, I’ll be on the front lines. ❞ Is this what being a Jedi is now? Synonymous with soldier? A bringer of death && destruction when it merits aspirant peace? ❝ I don’t know what’s going to happen to me. ❞

● ● ●

& VOMITS THESE WORDS ON YOU & i have a lot of pre-war padawan anakin feelings & youmaythinkyouknowme & ⟨ COMLINK. ⟩ & ⟨ arc ii. | TAKE THE LIGHT INSIDE YOU LIKE A BLESSING; LIKE A KNEE TO THE CHEST. ⟩

asteritm said: LISTEN I SENT A MEME I DIDN’T ASK 2 BE FUCKED UP ( i love this )
asteritm liked this
astramessiah posted this

WELCOME.

Hello and welcome to my blog! Thank you for taking the time to read my rules, I'll try and make this as quick as possible.

I only roleplay with mutuals. All my opens are for mutuals unless otherwise stated. But if we're not mutuals you're welcome to ask me questions and send me memes. I'm absolutely oc-friendly. So long as you have a rules page and an about, we're good.

I'm happy to write one-liners, paras, novellas, crack, or pretty much any content so long as my writing partners discuss it with me before hand.
(I will tag anything in my writing or reblogs that I think may be triggering. If there's something that triggers you untagged on my blog just pop me an ask and I'll be sure to tag it for you.)

I'm multiship and ship-exclusive. Meaning I'll ship with multiple people but only with one version of each character.
*Padmé is an exception to this rule as her relationship with Anakin is canon and vital to his characterization.

I'm not exclusive. Not unless you ask and we've established a good writing dynamic. I'm not a big fan of auto-exclusivity and if you require this of your followers there's a good chance I'm not going to follow you.

I hope i don't actually have to say this but just in case: god-modding will not be tolerated. If we're writing a battle scene i'd rather just pre-determine the winner than get into an ic dick-battle.

I'm not going to send in passwords on rules. It's an anxiety thing. rest assured i will read your rules. don't worry.

If a blog is inactive for 2+ months without a hiatus notice I'm going to likely unfollow you. Again, this is an anxiety thing and cleaning out my following helps me feel a bit more organized. But if you become active on that blog again I will definitely follow you back.

The art used in my background can be found here and here . The gif used in my header can be found here.

Finally, my name is scout, I'm 20, a sophomore in college, and a loser. Replies and activity is going to be spotty on this blog because of that. If we're mutuals i encourage you asking for my discord, I'll send you memes.

TAKE THE LIGHT INSIDE YOU.
Freed from slavery on Tatooine and freshly initiated into the Jedi Order, Padawan Skywalker works tirelessly to prove himself to the meticulous Council and earn his Knighthood. But with age comes uncertainty, and the beginning of a series of terrible nightmares featuring his mother's death. Every day the bright, enthusiastic child Qui-Gon Jinn brought to the Temple grows more and more distant from himself and others.

WEAPON OF WAR.
The galaxy is at war but Anakin Skywalker is fighting more than just external battles. Suspended between his loyalty to the Order and his loyalty to his wife, Anakin struggles to find a guiding light in the increasing darkness. And now that the nightmares have returned with his wife as their new feature, Anakin has begun to grow more and more desperate for a method to save Padmé from what he believes to be her doom.

THE WORST PARTS OF HIMSELF.
Anakin Skywalker died with the Republic, and in their place rose the Empire and its right hand: Darth Vader. Who will stop at nothing to rid the galaxy of every lingering memory of the life he had before his fall.

WHAT A MESS I LEAVE
Redeemed in the eyes of the Force, Anakin Skywalker has been granted sentience beyond death, allowing him to reach out to his descendents and warn them against repeating his mistakes.
FILTH TEACHES FILTH.
stranger things
Before 008, before 011, there was subject 001. Anakin Skywalker, the first of an entire generation veined with strange, incomprehensible powers. Disappeared at sixteen after his mother's mysteriously unreported murder at the hands of a local gang. His escape preceded 11's only by a few years, && now he's back in Hawkins on the trail of Brenner's prodigy.

SPANDEX & STEEL.
marvel/dc Born and raised in Tatooine, New Mexico, Anakin didn't think himself any different from the rest of the lonely souls living in the desert. That is, until his mother was killed by local gang members, jumpstarting a series of strange murders that forced him to go on the run. He's a metahuman, a mutant; with strange powers he can't control and the blood of several seriel murderers on his hands. Sometimes he owns a small car shop just outside of town, and sometimes he doesn't have a home at all.

WHEN THE WAR WINS.
modern Anakin, a war vet secluded in a no-name town in the middle of New Mexico, works to overcome his ptsd by becoming a hermit && buying the house his mother died in. His progress has been shaky, for obvious reasons.

DON'T CALL THIS REDEMPTION
alternate ending Believing himself to have died after passing out at the end of ROTJ, Vader, or Anakin now, awakens to a post-war galaxy to discover the eternal peace he sought is still far out of reach. Now a prisoner of the New Republic, Vader works alongside the Rebellion in secret as they dismantle the last vestiges of the Empire.
A DIFFERENT KIND OF LEGACY.
A private verse tied into ahphra's Sith verse and shadcwpreacher's alternate background. In this verse, after being rebuffed by his son, Vader looks to train Doctor Chelli Aphra as his apprentice.

The dark is generous, and it is patient. It is the dark that seeds cruelty into justice, that drips contempt into compassion, that poisons love with grains of doubt. The dark can be patient, because the slightest drop of rain will cause those seeds to sprout. The rain will come, and the seeds will sprout, for the dark is the soil in which they grow, and it is the clouds above them, and it waits behind the star that gives them light. The dark’s patience is infinite. Eventually, even stars burn out.

AND WE ASK OURSELVES

Are monsters born, or made?

Let me tell you the story that's been scored into the stars. The family that turned the galaxy upside down. There was a man, with the weight of a prophecy lining his shoulders, and a thermonuclear furnace in his heart. He loved a woman, a proud, strong, kind woman who loved him equally, despite the anger, and the Darkness that grew in him. And the man watched her die every night in his dreams.

That man told himself if he can carry a prophecy, he can prevent a dream from becoming reality. Whatever it takes.

Whoever it takes.

SO WHAT HAPPENED

The man exchanged his loyalty for her life, and killed the people who raised him. He ended a war in one night, the fire of the gods burning behind him on a metal moutaintop.

The woman he loved was no fool, she could sight a fire started in her name. A queen knows when someone is bowing.

She meets him on a molten planet, begs him to stray from the Darkness. But there is a shadow in the place of the man she loved, a monster.

He takes her breath to silence her, doomed to paranoia on the arrival of his brother, who is too, in some ways, a shadow. Forced to kill the man meant to save them all.

So the man dies, and is reborn. Baptized by fire. The woman he loved dies too. And eventually, even the brother dies.

WHO DID THE MAN BECOME

Darth Vader.

independent & private roleplay blog for anakin skywalker/darth vader of all star wars media. written by scout. || est. feb 2016.

Après nous, le déluge.

WELCOME.

verses

AND WE ASK OURSELVES

SO WHAT HAPPENED

WHO DID THE MAN BECOME

navigation