strongvoice.

            HER EYES FOLLOW HIS as they leave dorme’s presence, a smile on her lips as she bids her handmaiden a fair well and she’s left with anakin and the stars above them. THE WAR. her smile half slips but she’s not    ——   DENYING what happens outside of her walls, it’s just easier not to think about the fact that they might DIE at any moment. 

            their romance is built on vaguely naive hopes that everything will work out, fascinations that FAIR BETTER when they don’t have to think about the LONG TERM of it all.

            ( she can not, she admits, imagine an IDLE life with anakin. she has her hopes, but what is the end game of secret romance? either he leaves the order, or she may never be free of the lies that sustain them in the chaos of war. )

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            so instead she focuses on being something that might steady him, a ballast in a turbulent sea that she doesn’t quite understand. CAN’T understand for her LACK of the force.   ( she doesn’t envy the jedi though, or anakin. )               ❝well, you’re away from the war now,❞             padme does feel safer with his hands against her skin.

             ❝and you’re with me so let’s try to forget about it, as brief as these days might be. i do quite like when you get that little twinkle in your eye   ——   even if i can tell what’s on your mind, ❞              padme’s expression lightens some, and she leans up to kiss the corner of his mouth.

               SHE KINDLES A strength in Anakin’s heart to take the fighting without respite. Every moment away from the war is divine-sent, && she the angel who wields this inner peace upon her wings. Away from Padme, he sometimes finds himself longing for the clamor && the violence. Something loud && bloody to drown out the dark tides that drag behind his every thought. But here he is quiet, if for no other reason than her hands holding him. 

               Some day they will not have to hide, he’ll bare this truth in one way or another. Even if it kills him. 

     ❝ A twinkle, huh? Must be you. ❞ His eyes shine brighter, as if to prove her point, embrace tightening to a squeeze. Teeth grip the pinked flesh of his lip, && he tosses inside her kiss like a splinter in a flood. Too soon, too strong. A crashing kiss he lunges for. A kiss with death at the bottom of it. He thinks of the dark rooms upstairs && fine cotton sheets with no moon to light their turning bodies. Drowning, Anakin breathes her in, && she fills his lungs instead of air. 

               When they part he sees himself reflected in her eyes.

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     A soft breath: ❝ are you hungry? We could order something? ❞ There’s nothing more Anakin wants than to hold her in his arms forever, but there are other matters to attend to. Such as the way his stomach tightens in a growl at the mention of food. Several months surviving on pre-packaged vitamin tablets && rations can leave a man ravenous. Even if that hunger wasn’t a seemingly permanent aspect of his personality.

 
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independent & private roleplay blog for anakin skywalker/darth vader of all star wars media. written by scout. || est. feb 2016.