alderaanheir.

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             ANY BREATH left lingering in the aching confines of a raw throat is swiftly stolen from her lungs, only allowing a weak whimper to overcome her lips. She is numb, overwhelmingly so, but conscious enough to be all too aware of a mother & son’s realistic distance from one another, though the grip of the urge to cry out his name is strangling her will. Bones, already sore with the force of the fury claiming her body, are trembling as she slowly circles what she considers an illusion.

                                    ( It has to be.  )

            There is no way to tell how long her gaze is locked onto the form of a fallen Skywalker ; it is only when a realization strikes through her self-constructed mental blockade that she glances upwards.

            Ben Solo was not meant to be drawn into darkness, but to lead a torch to a new age of Jedi. His very existence was built upon aspiration for the future, his parents the epitome of a promise of change for the galaxy at large. This act could not have been encouraged by his own self, let alone carried out alone.

                                    There is a higher power.

            ❝    What did he do to my son ?    ❞

               THE DARK IS generous, && it is patient. Never gone but sometimes outshone. It exists to define the good in all beings — for even the brightest lights casts a shadow. It spins around all of us like a satellite, a dark star in the orbit where we blaze. Ready to seep into our bones at the slightest notice. && with the darkness comes its conductors, those who promote the shadows’ slow decay. Plagueis, Sidious, Snoke. They see potential && seek to snuff out what burns behind it. Ben had been groomed for his fall from the very beginning, just as Anakin had been. 

               It’d taken the spirit a long time to recognize that there is a difference between fate && the grim futures others forge for you. Monsters aren’t born, after all. 

     I believe Snoke had devised Ben’s fall from a young age, if not before he was born. He fostered the boy’s anger && fear, likely reaching out to him through dreams && building the shields that block me from his mind. I do not know the motivations behind Ben’s turn. Perhaps he thought he would be honoring my legacy of destruction, perhaps he was simply tired of fighting it. There is so much I don’t know, Leia… But I will show you what I do. 

 
independent & private roleplay blog for anakin skywalker/darth vader of all star wars media. written by scout. || est. feb 2016.