LET ME BE THE MONSTER.

^{what anakin has said: he developed a crush, dismissed it, and moved on as though nothing has changed. what she hears is exactly that, but padmé’s mind is keen to play a game of worst case scenarios. when? it’s another important question, but she does not know what she wants to hear. if it was BEFORE then is she a conciliation prize? it’s a stupid thought, and she KNOWS that, but it’s the smallest lingering doubt. had he acted on his emotions she does not know if they would have had the chance to develop into what they are now. if it was after, had he fallen in love, hadn’t he? he says he loves her, but she still worries that means some part of him may have fallen out of love her.}
^{she looks at her finger tips, eyes patterns and grooves that form her prints. padmé looks back up at him. there is a part of her, small and infinitely fragile that wants every day to make him choose between her and the galaxy. between her and ONE MAN does not seem so cruel, yet it’s worse in some regard. she can not help the overbearing weight that says he would HESITATE if she asked. her lips part and she looks at him with outright trepidation behind brown eyes.}
^{“i’m…” padmé’s voice trends uncharacteristically deep. she’s about to say had obi-wan just kissed him, she wouldn’t mind it so much. had it been a matter of enjoying the physicality of a kiss, she’d get it. but the neat boxes she’d made of her thoughts are coming apart under the weight of worry. hell, she had a childish crush on obi-wan once but he’d not kissed her. something tells her anakin wouldn’t respond to that terribly well.}
^{when his fist comes down on the arm of the couch —— she jumps, throws him a look before her hands come to her face and she makes a mental note to kill obi-wan. BY THE STARS what was with grown men running from their feelings. the foul taste in her mouth is definitely jealousy. her fingers press to her eyelids and she looks at him. “how do you want me to react to this, ani?” she asks, a second later. “every part of my mind says work through this like an interrogation or like we’re negotiating something, but it’s not that obi-wan KISSED you. it’s that you have FEELINGS for him. i’m much more hung up on that.”}

ANAKIN HAS TO steeple his fingers to lockdown a sudden swell of temper. The accusation he can hear teasing around his wife’s response threatens to push him past the threshold of anger && into some pure white country, cold && absolute. But the look of bridled ire && desolation that passes over his face acknowledges the impact of the change. But he does have feelings for Obi-Wan, && she has every right to fault him for that when he pledged his love && loyalty to her first.

This exhumed desire for his former master had resisted necessary compromise, as hopeless and incorrigible as ever; && for a second Anakin wishes he could slip back into the reprieving detachment that followed the kiss, when revelations && decisions had been forced on him at such a dizzying pace, they cauterized every other sentiment. Their eyes meet across the distance of years, but time speeds up && outrun his mind’s efforts to observe a logical progression. Thoughts scatter in a thousand directions, && he moves long before they can regroup, closing the distance. His flesh hand settles over Padme’s, pulling it from her face && forcing her to look at him.

❝ I don’t know what happened… I never wanted to hurt you, Padme ❞ Please don’t let this hurt you. ❝ Obi-Wan already said it couldn’t happen— &&— && even if he didn’t I’d always choose you, Padme. I would. ❞ He can’t hide the tremor in his voice when he says that, an insecurity that suggests that might not be true anymore. Not after everything that’s happened. ❝ I’m sorry Padme! I’m so sorry. You can’t be angry with me— I didn’t mean to. It wasn’t—… ❞ He drops off the couch onto his knees to supplicate at her feet, bringing her hostage hand to his lips where he can transfer the weight of his guilt through her flesh && bones.

❝ I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry. Please don’t leave me— I can’t live without you! ❞

● ● ● ● ●

& that good ol bpd coming out to play & 'dont leave me or i'll hate you' & astramajestic & ⟨ thread. | ASTRAMAJESTIC. ⟩ & ⟨ arc iii. | AN INSTRUMENT OF PEACE MADE A WEAPON OF WAR. ⟩

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WELCOME.

Hello and welcome to my blog! Thank you for taking the time to read my rules, I'll try and make this as quick as possible.

I only roleplay with mutuals. All my opens are for mutuals unless otherwise stated. But if we're not mutuals you're welcome to ask me questions and send me memes. I'm absolutely oc-friendly. So long as you have a rules page and an about, we're good.

I'm happy to write one-liners, paras, novellas, crack, or pretty much any content so long as my writing partners discuss it with me before hand.
(I will tag anything in my writing or reblogs that I think may be triggering. If there's something that triggers you untagged on my blog just pop me an ask and I'll be sure to tag it for you.)

I'm multiship and ship-exclusive. Meaning I'll ship with multiple people but only with one version of each character.
*Padmé is an exception to this rule as her relationship with Anakin is canon and vital to his characterization.

I'm not exclusive. Not unless you ask and we've established a good writing dynamic. I'm not a big fan of auto-exclusivity and if you require this of your followers there's a good chance I'm not going to follow you.

I hope i don't actually have to say this but just in case: god-modding will not be tolerated. If we're writing a battle scene i'd rather just pre-determine the winner than get into an ic dick-battle.

I'm not going to send in passwords on rules. It's an anxiety thing. rest assured i will read your rules. don't worry.

If a blog is inactive for 2+ months without a hiatus notice I'm going to likely unfollow you. Again, this is an anxiety thing and cleaning out my following helps me feel a bit more organized. But if you become active on that blog again I will definitely follow you back.

The art used in my background can be found here and here . The gif used in my header can be found here.

Finally, my name is scout, I'm 20, a sophomore in college, and a loser. Replies and activity is going to be spotty on this blog because of that. If we're mutuals i encourage you asking for my discord, I'll send you memes.

TAKE THE LIGHT INSIDE YOU.
Freed from slavery on Tatooine and freshly initiated into the Jedi Order, Padawan Skywalker works tirelessly to prove himself to the meticulous Council and earn his Knighthood. But with age comes uncertainty, and the beginning of a series of terrible nightmares featuring his mother's death. Every day the bright, enthusiastic child Qui-Gon Jinn brought to the Temple grows more and more distant from himself and others.

WEAPON OF WAR.
The galaxy is at war but Anakin Skywalker is fighting more than just external battles. Suspended between his loyalty to the Order and his loyalty to his wife, Anakin struggles to find a guiding light in the increasing darkness. And now that the nightmares have returned with his wife as their new feature, Anakin has begun to grow more and more desperate for a method to save Padmé from what he believes to be her doom.

THE WORST PARTS OF HIMSELF.
Anakin Skywalker died with the Republic, and in their place rose the Empire and its right hand: Darth Vader. Who will stop at nothing to rid the galaxy of every lingering memory of the life he had before his fall.

WHAT A MESS I LEAVE
Redeemed in the eyes of the Force, Anakin Skywalker has been granted sentience beyond death, allowing him to reach out to his descendents and warn them against repeating his mistakes.
FILTH TEACHES FILTH.
stranger things
Before 008, before 011, there was subject 001. Anakin Skywalker, the first of an entire generation veined with strange, incomprehensible powers. Disappeared at sixteen after his mother's mysteriously unreported murder at the hands of a local gang. His escape preceded 11's only by a few years, && now he's back in Hawkins on the trail of Brenner's prodigy.

SPANDEX & STEEL.
marvel/dc Born and raised in Tatooine, New Mexico, Anakin didn't think himself any different from the rest of the lonely souls living in the desert. That is, until his mother was killed by local gang members, jumpstarting a series of strange murders that forced him to go on the run. He's a metahuman, a mutant; with strange powers he can't control and the blood of several seriel murderers on his hands. Sometimes he owns a small car shop just outside of town, and sometimes he doesn't have a home at all.

WHEN THE WAR WINS.
modern Anakin, a war vet secluded in a no-name town in the middle of New Mexico, works to overcome his ptsd by becoming a hermit && buying the house his mother died in. His progress has been shaky, for obvious reasons.

DON'T CALL THIS REDEMPTION
alternate ending Believing himself to have died after passing out at the end of ROTJ, Vader, or Anakin now, awakens to a post-war galaxy to discover the eternal peace he sought is still far out of reach. Now a prisoner of the New Republic, Vader works alongside the Rebellion in secret as they dismantle the last vestiges of the Empire.
A DIFFERENT KIND OF LEGACY.
A private verse tied into ahphra's Sith verse and shadcwpreacher's alternate background. In this verse, after being rebuffed by his son, Vader looks to train Doctor Chelli Aphra as his apprentice.

The dark is generous, and it is patient. It is the dark that seeds cruelty into justice, that drips contempt into compassion, that poisons love with grains of doubt. The dark can be patient, because the slightest drop of rain will cause those seeds to sprout. The rain will come, and the seeds will sprout, for the dark is the soil in which they grow, and it is the clouds above them, and it waits behind the star that gives them light. The dark’s patience is infinite. Eventually, even stars burn out.

AND WE ASK OURSELVES

Are monsters born, or made?

Let me tell you the story that's been scored into the stars. The family that turned the galaxy upside down. There was a man, with the weight of a prophecy lining his shoulders, and a thermonuclear furnace in his heart. He loved a woman, a proud, strong, kind woman who loved him equally, despite the anger, and the Darkness that grew in him. And the man watched her die every night in his dreams.

That man told himself if he can carry a prophecy, he can prevent a dream from becoming reality. Whatever it takes.

Whoever it takes.

SO WHAT HAPPENED

The man exchanged his loyalty for her life, and killed the people who raised him. He ended a war in one night, the fire of the gods burning behind him on a metal moutaintop.

The woman he loved was no fool, she could sight a fire started in her name. A queen knows when someone is bowing.

She meets him on a molten planet, begs him to stray from the Darkness. But there is a shadow in the place of the man she loved, a monster.

He takes her breath to silence her, doomed to paranoia on the arrival of his brother, who is too, in some ways, a shadow. Forced to kill the man meant to save them all.

So the man dies, and is reborn. Baptized by fire. The woman he loved dies too. And eventually, even the brother dies.

WHO DID THE MAN BECOME

Darth Vader.

independent & private roleplay blog for anakin skywalker/darth vader of all star wars media. written by scout. || est. feb 2016.

astramajestic.

Après nous, le déluge.

WELCOME.

verses

AND WE ASK OURSELVES

SO WHAT HAPPENED

WHO DID THE MAN BECOME

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