the look he gives, half angry, draws her into further confusion. had she said something wrong, done the wrong thing? is there anything she can do to quiet his angry mind that she hasn’t already tried? padmé feels tired, even more so when he makes her look back at him. his pleading feels distant, like she’s watching a holodrama of her own life. once she’d thought these plots were silly, didn’t understand what could lead to IMPASSIONED begging, she’d never thought it’d have a place in her life. “is obi-wan still on coruscant?” because she wants to know the other side of the story, even if she can’t HAVE it.
he HADN’T WANTED to hurt her. it doesn’t mean she’s not hurt. the tremor in his voice when he means to offer her —— what? what does he mean to give? some hollow reassurance, that instead affirms her fears. the thought that should she say NO, should she ask him for time, he might run to obi-wan’s arms pulls her to shutter closed. a hard lock as she tries to process. she can feel tears though she blinks them back. NEVER let them see you afraid. they’d taught her that early.
she CAN’T be angry, he says. she can. she is, but it’s weighed down by despair and her hands within his own tense as he brings them to his lips.
“telling me how i can and can’t feel isn’t realistic. i know that this isn’t fair for you,” but, you still had far more agency than i did. but, you’re the one who married me in love with him. but you’re the chosen one, who am i to hold on to a star until my fingers blister? “but you have processing to do as well, i’m sure of that.” she settles on something kinder. “obi-wan will always be your master, you’ll always have a connection i don’t understand. and knowing that, i also know the two of you almost always work together. you’re —— anakin that’s not something i can compete with.” padmé does her best to bite back bitterness. her eyes beg him to understand, grasp her fear.
what if you leave me for him. even if it’s inevitable she forgives anakin, he might. could leave her, break her heart.
“kiss me. like i’m dying.”
THE KISS HAS balanced his heart between twostars, binary points of light strung on either side of him, && Anakin can’t imagine a galaxy without either one of them. It’s a heavy gift—he thinks in a strange fit of clarity—the awful && unflinching love of Anakin Skywalker. Maybe it had always been there, his love for both of them. In some ways it’s more comforting to think that way, that his interest in his former master is something he’d stored in his bones long ago && never acknowledged until now, instead of a byproduct of dissatisfaction in his marriage. ❝ No. I don’t know where he is. The Council won’t tell me && he won’t answer his comlink. ❞ Anakin sounds particularly dejected by this fact.
He understands her desperation more than he understands his own. Incoherent agony seethes at the corner of Anakin’s mind, threatening to flood his senses if she casts him out; a dark symphony waiting to wake the dragon. But her desperation doesn’t suffer the warped machinations of a hooded man, it’s as human as she is, organic— especially facing something that might break their marriage. ❝ But I love you, Padme. ❞ He tries, eyes begging her to grasp his fear. ❝ I love you. I love you so much. ❞
Her request comes as a surprise, but not an unwelcome one. He crowds close to her as allowed, clutching the delicate frame of her face as though she might slip from his grasp. It hasn’t been long since they last saw each other, but this closeness is still brutally, achingly missed. She feels like livingheat in his hands, molded down his center where they touch, a sunlight presence he can subtly brush with his mind. It ribbons tight through his soul, sealing a wound he was afraid could bleed forever. He licks into her mouth with reverence to match, fitting their lips together like it’s the last time. Like he would do anything, any terrible, unforgivable thing, to keep it from being the last time.
Hello and welcome to my blog! Thank you for taking the time to read my rules, I'll try and make this as quick as possible.
I only roleplay with mutuals. All my opens are for mutuals unless otherwise stated. But if we're not mutuals you're welcome to ask me questions and send me memes. I'm absolutely oc-friendly. So long as you have a rules page and an about, we're good.
I'm happy to write one-liners, paras, novellas, crack, or pretty much any content so long as my writing partners discuss it with me before hand.
(I will tag anything in my writing or reblogs that I think may be triggering. If there's something that triggers you untagged on my blog just pop me an ask and I'll be sure to tag it for you.)
I'm multiship and ship-exclusive. Meaning I'll ship with multiple people but only with one version of each character.
*Padmé is an exception to this rule as her relationship with Anakin is canon and vital to his characterization.
I'm not exclusive. Not unless you ask and we've established a good writing dynamic. I'm not a big fan of auto-exclusivity and if you require this of your followers there's a good chance I'm not going to follow you.
I hope i don't actually have to say this but just in case: god-modding will not be tolerated. If we're writing a battle scene i'd rather just pre-determine the winner than get into an ic dick-battle.
I'm not going to send in passwords on rules. It's an anxiety thing. rest assured i will read your rules. don't worry.
If a blog is inactive for 2+ months without a hiatus notice I'm going to likely unfollow you. Again, this is an anxiety thing and cleaning out my following helps me feel a bit more organized. But if you become active on that blog again I will definitely follow you back.
The art used in my background can be found here and here . The gif used in my header can be found here.
Finally, my name is scout, I'm 20, a sophomore in college, and a loser. Replies and activity is going to be spotty on this blog because of that. If we're mutuals i encourage you asking for my discord, I'll send you memes.
verses
CANON.
AU.
PRIVATE.
TAKE THE LIGHT INSIDE YOU.
Freed from slavery on Tatooine and freshly initiated into the Jedi Order, Padawan Skywalker works tirelessly to prove himself to the meticulous Council and earn his Knighthood. But with age comes uncertainty, and the beginning of a series of terrible nightmares featuring his mother's death. Every day the bright, enthusiastic child Qui-Gon Jinn brought to the Temple grows more and more distant from himself and others.
WEAPON OF WAR.
The galaxy is at war but Anakin Skywalker is fighting more than just external battles. Suspended between his loyalty to the Order and his loyalty to his wife, Anakin struggles to find a guiding light in the increasing darkness. And now that the nightmares have returned with his wife as their new feature, Anakin has begun to grow more and more desperate for a method to save Padmé from what he believes to be her doom.
THE WORST PARTS OF HIMSELF.
Anakin Skywalker died with the Republic, and in their place rose the Empire and its right hand: Darth Vader. Who will stop at nothing to rid the galaxy of every lingering memory of the life he had before his fall.
WHAT A MESS I LEAVE
Redeemed in the eyes of the Force, Anakin Skywalker has been granted sentience beyond death, allowing him to reach out to his descendents and warn them against repeating his mistakes.
FILTH TEACHES FILTH. stranger things Before 008, before 011, there was subject 001. Anakin Skywalker, the first of an entire generation veined with strange, incomprehensible powers. Disappeared at sixteen after his mother's mysteriously unreported murder at the hands of a local gang. His escape preceded 11's only by a few years, && now he's back in Hawkins on the trail of Brenner's prodigy.
SPANDEX & STEEL. marvel/dc
Born and raised in Tatooine, New Mexico, Anakin didn't think himself any different from the rest of the lonely souls living in the desert. That is, until his mother was killed by local gang members, jumpstarting a series of strange murders that forced him to go on the run. He's a metahuman, a mutant; with strange powers he can't control and the blood of several seriel murderers on his hands. Sometimes he owns a small car shop just outside of town, and sometimes he doesn't have a home at all.
WHEN THE WAR WINS. modern
Anakin, a war vet secluded in a no-name town in the middle of New Mexico, works to overcome his ptsd by becoming a hermit && buying the house his mother died in. His progress has been shaky, for obvious reasons.
DON'T CALL THIS REDEMPTION alternate ending
Believing himself to have died after passing out at the end of ROTJ, Vader, or Anakin now, awakens to a post-war galaxy to discover the eternal peace he sought is still far out of reach. Now a prisoner of the New Republic, Vader works alongside the Rebellion in secret as they dismantle the last vestiges of the Empire.
A DIFFERENT KIND OF LEGACY.
A private verse tied into ahphra's Sith verse and shadcwpreacher's alternate background. In this verse, after being rebuffed by his son, Vader looks to train Doctor Chelli Aphra as his apprentice.
The dark is generous, and it is patient. It is the dark that seeds cruelty into justice, that drips contempt into compassion, that poisons love with grains of doubt. The dark can be patient, because the slightest drop of rain will cause those seeds to sprout. The rain will come, and the seeds will sprout, for the dark is the soil in which they grow, and it is the clouds above them, and it waits behind the star that gives them light. The dark’s patience is infinite. Eventually, even stars burn out.
AND WE ASK OURSELVES
Are monsters born, or made?
Let me tell you the story that's been scored into the stars. The family that turned the galaxy upside down. There was a man, with the weight of a prophecy lining his shoulders, and a thermonuclear furnace in his heart. He loved a woman, a proud, strong, kind woman who loved him equally, despite the anger, and the Darkness that grew in him. And the man watched her die every night in his dreams.
That man told himself if he can carry a prophecy, he can prevent a dream from becoming reality. Whatever it takes.
Whoever it takes.
SO WHAT HAPPENED
The man exchanged his loyalty for her life, and killed the people who raised him. He ended a war in one night, the fire of the gods burning behind him on a metal moutaintop.
The woman he loved was no fool, she could sight a fire started in her name. A queen knows when someone is bowing.
She meets him on a molten planet, begs him to stray from the Darkness. But there is a shadow in the place of the man she loved, a monster.
He takes her breath to silence her, doomed to paranoia on the arrival of his brother, who is too, in some ways, a shadow. Forced to kill the man meant to save them all.
So the man dies, and is reborn. Baptized by fire. The woman he loved dies too. And eventually, even the brother dies.
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